Joy.

my heart could burst today.

the words of mumford and sons singing.
the cool breeze blowing through my house.

a conversation with an old friend that both brought new realizations to the forefront of my mind and heart. our conversation pouring out amongst crying toddlers and diaper changes. they were words from her mouth, but they were words from my heart. how i needed to hear them. and while it was from an unexpected soul, i am so grateful. to be heard. to be known. to be exposed. to be honest and real. i am anxiously excited about what the Lord has in store for me. and for her. for us.

a call to my mom. for who knows me (aside from my husband) like she who bore me? she who celebrates and mourns along side me. she was too, excited, surprised, but thankful.

another dear friend. one whom i don't really know in the normal capacity of friendship, but is a dear, sweet, kindred spirit. oh how i celebrate with her today. how my heart sings for her joy.

the Lord is good. He is big and all powerful and worthy and deserving to be feared. but in the same breath, is a God so big, that all things fall short of his Glory. all things fall short of His purposes. He is a God that DOES want to give us the desires of our hearts. who wants to answer our cries and mend our wounds. He wants to teach and mold and protect. if only we submit. oh Lord, I pray for my submission. that it would be honest and unfailing. that I would just let go. to see what you really have for me. whatever it is, it will be sufficient. whatever my lot, YOU have taught me to say, it is well, it IS well with my soul.

this day has been imperfect. flawed. i didn't eat breakfast. i lost patience with my boys. we were late to speech (again). i didn't get to swim as long as i would have liked to at the gym. my plans of perfectly organizing all that i need to for this weekend have yet to happen. a child well beyond the phase of "accidents" having such an accident. a nap time filled with puzzles instead of actually napping.

BUT.

work was accomplished. bugs worked out. real conversations. coffee in the afternoon. an album, that while not your typical worship album, creating worship in my heart and home. a friendship grown. lessons learned. laundry accomplished.

joy seen.

joy felt.

it is well with my soul.

Love it will not betray you, dismay or enslave you,
It will set you free
Be more like the man you were made to be.
There is a design,
An alignment to cry,
Of my heart to see,
The beauty of love as it was made to be

my heart is full and glad.